For I Know the Plans I Have For You...

Jeremiah 29:11 has become a pivotal verse for me in the past few years. Knowing God has a plan that is for my good and is better than my plan helps me to trust more, to lean more, and to let go of my plans more. And yet, we all have thoughts about what we think God's plan for us will look like. We speculate and we hope we know what the plan looks like for us. So when we see someone around us living out what we think is God's plan for us, we get mad. We get jealous. We get disappointed. We get angry. We don't understand, and we never will. Because God's ways are not our ways and his thoughts are higher than ours. Today a friend reminded me that God's plan for me is special. It's not like his plan for the people around me, but it is just for me. That statement gave me hope. It's hard to trust God when there is nothing concrete to hold on to. And yet I see his hand at work in my life. He is leading me one step at a time, giving me guidance, day by day. It is my personality to compare myself to others and to compare God's plan for me with his plan for others. Why is everything so easy for everyone else, but I have to struggle? Why do I have to go through so many more valleys before I reach the mountaintop? And I am reminded that I am not them and they are not me. In the same way, God's plan for each of us is unique and special. And all his plans are for our good.

"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. " Jeremiah 29:11 The Message

New York Vacation Pictures

Maybe it's not about me...

Today I was driving to the gym and praying. I pray a lot while I'm in my car. It's just me and God and it's one of the places I am not easily distracted. While I was driving and singing and praying, a thought hit me. Ok, it was more like God put a thought in my head, but either way its something I've never really thought about.

Maybe this trial isn't just about me.

When we are going through stuff, as we all do, we look for some hope or some encouragement to help us endure. To help us be faithful to God when things don't make sense. We talk about all the scriptures that say "consider it joy when you face trials" and "God works everything for the the good of those who love him" and we find the determination to keep on believing for a miracle. Somehow knowing that God will provide and knowing that God is teaching us and stretching us during this difficult time makes it tolerable. But have you ever thought about the people watching you? The way you endure a trial and the way you are faithful to God when you don't understand and the way you keep going may be speaking loudly to someone around you. Maybe your trial is the one thing that will bring someone closer to God. Maybe your test is the example they will stand on, to believe that God will do something for them to. We all have those people, those stories of others that we hold on to, that give us hope that God has not forgotten us. What if your trial is someone else's hope? Then, I think we'd consider it worth it. If my pain and my struggle shows someone they aren't alone, shows them that God is worthy of holding on to, it is worth it. If I can hold on, maybe someone else will know they can cling closer to God during the difficult times. God made us a family for a reason. We need each other and our struggles are just a part of God's big plan for us to encourage each other and walk together through it all and come out victorious on the other side by God's grace.

Smorgasbord Sunday - a little of this, a little of that

-Ever prayed for something and then moved on, only to see God be faithful and answer your prayers after you had almost forgotten what you asked for? We are human, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who this has happened to. For me, prayer request rotate in cycles. Not in a planned cycle but based on how God is speaking to me or how he is changing my heart during that time of my life. There are some people I always pray certain days of the week, because they depend on me and I owe it to them, and because God is faithful. Generally I depend on God to bring people and situations to my mind as he wants me to pray for them. He knows best. I actually find that when I've totally given a situation to God, trusting him completely, I don't even pray about it any more. It isn't because the situation is taken care of, but it isn't heavy on my heart any more and I simply trust God to take care of things. So today God answered two of those prayers for me. When I least expected it, when I had moved on, just trusting God to be who he said he was. Because his timing is perfect, always. Praise God! So just when you think it is worthless, never give up because with God all things are possible. -God speaks, you obey, or at least that's the way it is ideally. For me it usually goes more something like God speaks, I question him and make sure it's him, I talk myself out of obeying, I freak out, think of all the possible bad results, I dread obedience, and then I obey. True to form, today I finally obeyed God with something I've been struggling with. You know, it is never as bad as the devil convinces you it is going to be. That's how he gets to you. He uses fear, hoping that you'll never obey and God will never get the opportunity to show off. So, for me, I do usually eventually obey, and God's will is accomplished. If I could just get myself to skip the whole freaking myself out part, this would be so much less stressful. Goodness, Sandra, why do you give the devil that control? I've got to obey faster and not give myself the time or opportunity to over think everything. -Tax season is over and now the boredom/depression sets in. You get so used to working a lot of hours mentally and physically that after its over, the days drag on forever. Now if I can just survive until Thanksgiving that would be nice. -Got some Christmas shopping done yesterday with B.J. Three down, 532 to go. (It's really not as bad as it sounds, but exaggeration makes things more interesting ) -Still getting more info on more kids. We haven't submitted our home study for any kids yet, but in God's time it'll all come together. Hope you enjoyed your tasting of the different things roaming around in my head. Till Later!

Being Me

So I've been dealing with a few tense situations for a while. Like walking on eggshells, tense. I've been waiting for something, someone to break the tension. Don't wait on anyone to do what you should do yourself. I was trying to get away from the craziness instead of getting in the thick of it and dealing. I don't deal well, I don't do confrontation well, but I got over myself and did only what I can do. And that is be me. So why do we always think someone else is going to remedy the situation? Why do we wait around on someone else instead of taking initiative? Because we are scared of the response we will get or the rejection we may have to endure. And then I am reminded that I can only control me and God won't give me more than I can handle. If God is putting me here, he must think I can handle a lot more than I think I can. By the way, the eggshells have disappeared, at least from my perspective, and I am free to be me again. No, I'm not going to pry where I am not welcome, but I won't be over-thinking every action every word again. Because my happiness is not dependent on man's approval but on God's and I know I'm right where he wants me.

Sunday Funday

Warning: Random Post -I love my Sunday School class! Absolutely love them. Love teaching them. We know we are exactly where God wants us for now. But today was hard. Ever since we took this class 3+ years ago God has been stretching me. Before we took the college/career class, we taught K-2nd grade and it was pretty easy. Yes, I came in early every so often to redecorate the room and get games and such together, but basically we did the lesson from the Sunday School literature plus a few fun things I'd learned in my years teaching kids before. At that age its easy to use the literature and make it applicable to them personally and know they are learning something. When we took the college/career class I immediately knew that no literature would fit the group of students we were getting. So I've asked God to speak to them through me. Every week I seek God for what they need to hear. I knew that I was obeying God today when we talked about guarding your heart, but for some reason the words couldn't come out of my mouth right and I felt like I was talking to a brick wall. I know that with this group I don't usually see a great response to what I say, but today I felt like a failure. But God is faithful, always! And His word is powerful, always! And he doesn't depend on my abilities or competency to fulfill his plans. Isaiah 55:10-11 "As the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that is yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth; it will not return to me empty but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." -So God has prompted me to start studying His love in my devotion time in the upcoming weeks. I am trusting Him to show me things I haven't seen before and to speak to me, and He is always faithful. -No post would be complete without an adoption update. We were licensed for adoption this past Monday and have since been receiving information about kids available for adoption. It is kinda difficult to see the pictures and get the info and not fall in love. I told BJ I want to adopt every kid in the state of Texas that doesn't have a home and we need to get a bigger house. Ha! Just so you know, we won't be able to share very much info on here about our kids once we get them and before they are adopted because of the confidentiality agreement. I totally understand the purpose of keeping things quiet and we will just have to be vague for a bit. -5 more work days until work calms down through the holidays. I am definitely looking forward to a little reprieve from all the craziness in my life right now. Maybe I'll get some scrapbooking caught up. One can always hope! :) -Turbo Kickboxing is calling my name. Soon I'll be able to get back in that groove. I miss it. -Maybe BJ should post pics of the New York trip. (He's reading this as I write, so that may actually happen before Christmas.)