Wasted Years

When you are a planner, like I am, and your plans don't work in your time, it is hard to think there aren't years that were wasted. When B.J. and I got married over 7 years ago, I asked him when he wanted to have kids and his response was "I just don't want to be an old dad." We were 24 and 21 when we got married, so I figured I wouldn't have any problem making sure he had kids before he was "old". (Whatever that means. It is all so relative.) Well, he is now 31 and I'm 28 so I feel like I may not be able to meet that stipulation. Not that B.J. is mad or anything like that because he knows we can't control what is going on with us right now. If it were up to me, and it apparently is not, we would have 2 kids by now or at least one and one on the way. But God has different plans and I am totally okay with that. However, there are days when I think about the wasted years. Where would we be if this whole journey of having a family was easy and quick for us? I have a friend who perfectly planned all three of her pregnancy to have each of her children in June so her husband (a teacher) could be off with her after the babies were born. Sometimes I envy her. And then I remember God's plan is perfect. It isn't plan B because plan A didn't work. Sometimes I think we think God has a backup plan. If we could just get it into our heads and hearts that his first plan is perfect and will be accomplished, that might just change our theology a bit. Back to wasted years. I read this verse the other day and it resonated with me (another way of saying the Holy Spirit hit me between the eyes with the truth in it.)

Joel 2:25 "I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten."

Isn't that awesome? God is aware that we feel like time has been wasted and we are still waiting and he has promised to repay us for our time of waiting when we don't see the promise yet, but are just trusting him faithfully. In Sandra's translation, it says, "Don't worry about it. I'll make it up to you and it'll be worth the wait. The times of wanting and needing and not seeing provision, I'll reward you for holding on against hope and against reason." So I think I'm going to make this my new verse of promise to hold on to. So here's to another week, another month, another year of waiting. Not hopelessly, or for some magic moment, but on God, who knows exactly what he is doing and when his perfect time will come. Because God sees the waiting period and he will repay me for what I view as wasted years.