If you are in my Sunday School class (and I would dare say the only
one of my readers this applies to is my husband) you've heard me pray
and thank God because he sees me and knows me. Initially this was
something I started saying to remind me of God's grace when I fail or to
remind me that God knows where I am in life and so he is gracious to
cut me some slack right now.
But I think I've overused
that statement and it has become my excuse for not giving myself fully
to what God has called me to. Yes, I'm tired and living in a time of
transition especially with Seth and sleeping/midnight feedings, but it
is time for me to fix some things. If I am honest with myself (and I
guess the little corner of the world that reads this), I have placed my
wind down time after everyone has gone to bed over God. Not that I don't
get my daily time in with God, but it isn't what I'd like it to be in
length or depth. Because I am making some poor choices. I have this need
to watch my DVR'd shows and clear them off of my DVR, and as silly as
that sounds, I am left exhausted when it gets to my time with God. And
so, he gets my left overs.
And I know his grace is sufficient for me, but I've got to stop making excuses and just make him my priority. For the sake of my relationship with him. Because I'm not where I need to be.
Gonna work on this again. Definitely not the first time I'm been here. I know what I should do, but I don't do it. (I feel like Paul in Romans 7, constantly struggling with this.)
But I must keep moving forward. Despite my reasons and excuses. Because God deserves my best.
1 comment:
Girl I hear ya. It's easy to let little things get in the way. I seem to go thru those cycles too. In one now too, in fact. Praying your time with Him is rich!
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