As we travel this Christian journey, I feel like we hold onto a certain part of God's character more than others. There was a time in my life when I focused on the faithfulness of God. Right now, I keep coming back to this verse in Psams. Every time I start to pray my mind comes back to this verse and I find myself thanking God for being compassionate and gracious.
Maybe it's because it is hard for me to be compassionate. It isn't in my nature, especially if I feel like the person is being irresponsible or making bad choices that are putting them in the place that requires my compassion. I expect people to have common sense and try everything they can to help themselves before sharing their story and asking for help from others. I don't like people who are always the victim. All that to say I am probably the opposite of compassionate. And yet God is compassionate towards me when I mess things up.
I have a temper. I blow up when I shouldn't and have to ask for forgiveness often. I put expectations on others that they can't meet and then I'm mad when they don't measure up. I get mad when I don't measure up. And then I feel bad for not being more patient like I want others to be with me. But God is slow to anger.
My love is tough love a lot. I'm not really a touchy feely huggy kind. But I love hugs and need a gentle touch from time to time. I'm just not usually the one to initiate. And I make people feel unloved because I tend to show my love by telling it like it is. But God is abounding in love toward me even when I feel unloveable.
When I compare myself to him, I know that I have a long way to go. I'm so glad he doesn't give up on my and all my failings.
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