Still Enough

It's Christmas Eve, also known as Katelynn's birthday. We have had a small celebration including pizza for dinner and now the kids are watching Despicable Me in their new jammies.  I would have loved to go to a Christmas Eve service somewhere, but I don't want to go alone and tonight is a later night at work for BJ than usual.

Finished another book today which brings my total for 2015 to 26 books, only 4 of which were nonfiction. The other 22 books were Karen Kingbury books (Christian fiction). And although these books are definitely my escape from reality, these particular books always point back to the faithfulness of God. They challenge me to trust God more. To rely on him better.

This statement jumped out at me today:

Even if God doesn't______(fill in the blank), He is still enough.

Think about it. How often does our understanding of God's ability to provide and to take care of us depend on him answering our prayers in the way we think best?

When God answers by choosing to take someone to heaven rather than heal them here or allow people to grow apart and find him in their own way rather than reconcile them back to us HE IS STILL ENOUGH!

When God's answer to our prayer is no or not now, HE IS STILL ENOUGH!

When God lets us go through the most difficult unexpected circumstances rather than deliver us from them, HE IS STILL ENOUGH!

Even if I never feel like I am enough for this crazy calling we call motherhood, HE IS STILL ENOUGH!

Our finite minds can never understand the infinite wisdom of God and yet we are frustrated when he doesn't do things the way that appears easiest to us. If I can understand God, I have put him in a box and limited him by my unbelief.

I've been going through some spiritual stretching and growing and it hurts. My kids often have growing pains/cramps at night and I've never understood (I never had any of that growing up), but I'm starting to understand on a spiritual level what that is like.

I feel lost sometimes and like I'm living on my own planet at others. Often when I come to the throne room of God, I feel so broken and inadequate for the task at hand. I fail. He knows it and chose me anyways. I've learned to go to him with a heart of praise and worship, especially when I don't have mental energy for it. And he's faithful to meet me there.

Because he is and will always be enough for me! Not because of me, but all because of him!