Before I start, let me apologize if the title of this blog has started a neverending cycle of the Israel Houghton song in your head. Seriously!! Now on to the good stuff...
As a Christian, one of the most important things to us should be our relationship with God. Christian means "Christlike" and is not synonymous with "church-goer." Whereas most Christians would assume that having a relationship with God would assume friendship, God's been speaking to me about different kinds of relationships. Relationship refers to the connection between two people (or things) so in one sense everyone has some relationship with God. That doesn't mean they are close to God or that they are even on his team, but there is some relationship there.
There are two different kinds of relationships: acquaintance and friend. An acquaintance is someone who knows of or is familiar with someone but has no personal connection to the other person. Here is where I would put "church-goers" and even enemies of God. Even those who spend their energy proving God doesn't exist or advocating against him have some knowledge of him and therefore an relationship or connection to him.
Then, there are friends. (Here's the part that just was a lightbulb moment for me. I love when God does that!) There are two kinds of friends (naturally and spiritually). First, friends of convenience. These are people you wouldn't naturally be friends with but due to a circumstance that brings you together, you become friends. This is where I would put coworkers, classmates, club members like PTA moms and similar friends. Generally, you hang out with these people at the designated time but don't see them apart from that. When the circumstance that brought you together ends, the friendship is over or at least your normal communication or "hang out" time ends. These are also people you consider your friends when it benefits you. Like if you need help with something you know they can help with. These relationships are selfish at best. You aren't enemies, but for sure, you haven't really invested in these relationships but have learned to work with people because that is what was required for the time.
The other type of friendship is friends of intention. This is the relationship that you invest in. That you pursue. That are at the forefront of your minds and are your priority. The friendships that require your total sacrifice and you receive the same in return from the other party.
So when you look at your relationship with God, is it an acquaintance, a friendship of convenience, or a friendship of intention? There is a big difference. Are you pursuing God the way he wants to be pursued or do you just go to him when you need something from him? Are you intentional to spend time with him or only when you have excess time that day? Is he your main thing or your spare tire?
We are studying the book of James in Sunday School (Chapter 4 tomorrow) and there is a passage that starts our talking about how we don't have things because we don't ask God. I would quickly identify this as a friendship of convenience, but here's the thing. God asks us to come to him, to ask for help, even if we view him as our 9-1-1 operator or for selfish reasons. Why? Because many times that is where he can begin to call us deeper. If we have no relationship with God at all, yes he can draw us, but if we are in a place where we need God, so we come to him out of necessity, He has us where we are in listening mode. And there he can start to prove his love to us. I say all that to say, don't be ashamed if God is your friend of convenience right now. At least he's your friend and not just an acquaintance. Yes, as we spend more time with God, he can become so much more to us, but we all have to start somewhere.
Intimate relationship with God is a never ending cycle of pursuit, repentance, and change. As we pursue God and closeness with God, he shows us our messes. We repent because we know that is the only way to continue our journey forward and he requires us to change. Once we've taken that step by faith, he call us to pursue him again. Although it feels like 3 steps forward, 2 steps back, the net affect is forward progress.
So don't be discouraged if pursuing intentional friendship and closeness with God doesn't happen like you wished or as quickly as you'd like. As long as your pursuing, that's forward growth. Closer to His Heart. And the changing he's doing in you is worth it.
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