Scared? Not me!

For the first time in 7 weeks I'm not scared. "Of what?" you might ask.  Let me back up a bit here and catch you up. (TMI warning!!)

Starting in July when we found out we had been selected for our kids I have been telling everyone, EVERYONE and for the most part they were all excited for us. But the next sentence that has come out of their mouth was "You know you are gonna get pregnant as soon as you get the kids, right?" Sounds like an answer to prayer, right? But 7 weeks ago I realized I was so not ready to be a new mom to three and prego all at once. SO NOT READY! I kinda laughed it off, but it was really starting to worry me.  (Enter me trying to figure it all out, again. You'd think I had learned my lesson by now, but apparently not.)  I thought about going back on birth control. I started being lazy with taking my Synthroid. I paid really close attention to my cycle to avoid my husband at certain times of the month. (Not that being totally exhausted left room for any intimacy between us, but just in case, I was really aware.) There were a couple of points in the last 7 weeks when I would have told you I would be really mad at God and really depressed if I ended up pregnant so soon after getting the kids. These weeks of getting adjusted have been really hard on me, on us, and have definitely had me reconsidering wanting any more kids at all. Ever.

But now, I say, God, bring it on, if that's what you want for us. I'm not sure what has changed in the last week or even the last couple of days, but I know that God will not give us more than we can handle. So I am resting in that and knowing that God knows what he is doing. I choose to "consider it all joy" (James 1:2) and not worry about the what ifs. And still, as if I had to relearn everything again, I trust that God's timing is perfect. 

No, I'm not pregnant, just to clear the air and stop any rumors or speculations from growing in your heads.

Pictures today went pretty well. I am waiting on Andi to work her magic and then I can get the announcements/Christmas cards/New Years cards made and sent out. We definitely had God's favor on the day as it stopped raining just long enough for us to get our pics in. Because God is faithful.

7 weeks down, about 17 to go before things will be made final and I can post names and pictures on this blog. I am sure most of you are tired of not having pics, and quite frankly, so am I. Do you know how hard it is to have kids and not be able to post pics of them? I know there are blogs I go to and I look at only because of how cute the kids are.  So I am kinda bummed that I can't offer you that yet.  Let me tell you that when that day comes, those of you who are not my facebook friends will be amazed at how much our kids look like us. God is just amazing and worked all that out for us splendidly if I do say so myself.