Vacation is my Enemy

It is nice to get away for a few days and to get a break from work, but I am sure I am not the only parent who feels like vacation brings out the worst in me. I haven't decided if its just being with the kids 24 hours a day that wears on my patience or if I just care too much about what others think about my kids behavior or my parenting or both. I often find myself yelling and frustrated at the kids and feeling ignored and disrespected. And I am certainly not without fault. I don't handle the constant bickering well and am not good at ignoring the immaturity of kids when it comes to tattling and whining. Like nails on a chalkboard.

As God would have it (seeing how I don't believe in coincidence) I am reading two separate books and both have provided a kick in the gut, spotlighting my weaknesses. In The Battlefield of the Mind, Joyce Meyer points out that the devil loves to keep us critical of others ( in this case my kids) so we never see or deal with our own sin. She also states that "the mind of Christ in us is positive; therefore any time we get negative we are not operating in the mind of Christ."  Guilty as charged. I have got to stop being so negative and critical and let God give me a new positive perspective. It all starts with simply thinking positive thoughts which all starts by thinking about what I am thinking about.  And using God's word to fill my mind with positive thoughts.

The other book is talking about how many women put pressure on themselves to be or at least appear perfect. I struggle with this. Not because I really think I can make things perfect, but I find some safety in at least feeling in control of my life. And God gently reminds me through the writing of Holley Gerth "Beautiful daughter of mine, you don't need to be perfect. You are already perfectly loved."

And I know that God isn't rebuking or chastising me, but showing me his never-ending grace. So I am learning to not be so hard on myself and accept God's grace, forgive myself, get back up and keep going.

There are a few days left of this trip, so I am going to make it count. By being loving and gracious to my kids and myself and enjoying the last few moments we have before we are thrown back into normal life.