Polarizing

I've learned that people either like me or they don't. They either understand me or they think I am rude and mean.

And that's okay. Rather, I am okay with that.

Let's start by saying I used to live my life for everyone else. I was very concerned about what others thought about my choices and tried to please them all. I came across as confident and self assured but inside I was hurt and insecure. So insecure that I became whomever I thought people wanted me to be.

Pretending is a lot of work. So I've come to terms with the fact that some people will never get me and some personality types will always be uncomfortable around me. Because I know that I can be honest to a fault. I know I can be insensitive. I know I expect people to respond to me the way I would respond in the same situation. And that just isn't realistic.

I have prayed about this a lot and have asked God if these things are character flaws that I need to change or let him change about me or if I am who be made me to be, just like I am.  And honestly, God hasn't pointed his finger in my heart, well at least not about my directness and honesty, asking me to change these.

I know I come off as hard sometimes. But sometimes we need someone in our face to speak in love to us for our good.

And for whatever reason I have been that person in a lot of situations. It isn't fun getting the reactions I do and it isn't pleasant to be misunderstood. But my heart is always for your good. So remember that. God didn't send me your way to tear you down and to discourage you, but to open your eyes to how things really are. To the truth about your choices. By no means am I saying I am the ultimate in wisdom and knowledge, but I do know what God has shown me and I am not afraid to speak his truth. That is my place right now.

The body of Christ has failed many times because we want to sugarcoat everything, hoping we don't hurt someone's feelings. And in the process no one ever hears or sees the truth. The body lives in deception and the devil has a field day. Truth exposes the lies and dishonesty in our lives. It exposes our weaknesses when we'd rather sweep them under the rug. And truth can and will break us down to the very core of our existence. But only from the bottom can we rebuild our lives in God and replace the lies in the foundations of our spiritual existence with the realities of God, the truth of Gods word.

Although I may not be the most eloquent speaker or writer, hear this. If the church is built on faulty foundations, it needs to be torn down. And tearing down hurts. But the rebuilding is glorious and the church is always better because it has been destroyed.

So in love, I pray that you will let God speak to you through the truth of his word, whomever the vessel, and understand the one he uses is for you. On your side. To help you, in love. To make you better so God's plan can be amazingly seen in you in ways that would never have been were if not for the truth.